SELF-LOVE • Part 1: Why loving yourself is important and unselfish

"I've always loved myself!"

I can't say the same for myself. And you? But I can tell you: On my personal way towards more self-love I have never met a person who would say that about himself or herself. And that is OK and even important. Self-love is not a privilege of higher social classes, but a must for an intact environment and a harmonious living together in which nobody is left out.

I am Romy Rinke,

self-love coach, and I accompany people on their way to please themselves and thereby become more successful in all areas of life; privately, in relationships and in the professional environment.

Why? Because I would have wished for these words, this support and this hold when I was far away from loving myself. Body shame, the opinions of others, an eating disorder and a body sometimes covered with neurodermatitis were faithful and equally unpleasant companions.

At the same time, and I see this in many of my clients, I have always felt my potential. I knew I was capable of many things, but I could not yet find access to this potential (which frustrated me even more). After 6 years of traveling, I completed my studies and further education.

Through additional philosophical, spiritual and holistic world views, which I was allowed to get to know, I drew and realized an all-encompassing arc: All that eastern spirituality, modern spirituality, philosophies, theories and the scene of personal development want to teach us is self-love.

What is self-love and what is it good for?

Self-love helps you to distinguish yourself from the opinions of others. It helps you to follow your path without fear of outside condemnation. It helps you to have harmonious interpersonal relationships without being exploited and deceived or feeling worthless. She helps you to love your body so that it serves you in your plans.

Above all it helps you to get out of your own way in order to follow your real path!

How does Self-Love work?

Many people are beginning to understand their importance, but how do we concretize self-love and how do we practice self-love? Love is a big word (if not the biggest). We cannot force, learn or wish for love. And self-love is not possible either. The two most important things that love and therefore self-love follows are acceptance and respect. Acceptance and respect not only for our beautiful qualities, but especially for the "unbeautiful" ones.

Acceptance vs. refusal and ignorance

„Refusal and ignorance have not yet created a beautiful and harmonious relationship; neither with others nor with oneself.“

— Romy Rinke

If we appreciate and love only a part of ourselves, we will always feel emptiness and unfulfilled. We take a big step towards more self-love when we learn to accept, respect and love our most unpleasant quality. Changing one's perspective and seeing the gift or teaching behind unpleasantness will change many things. So we establish more openness, understanding and compassion towards ourselves. Refusal and ignorance have not yet created a beautiful and harmonious relationship; neither with others nor with ourselves.

Self-love is selfish

A full glass of water, where water is love, compassion and understanding, allows other glasses to be filled with water. An empty glass of water prevents you from doing exactly that, because you have nothing to share. But if we learn to fill our glass with water all the time, we become a source of love, compassion and understanding. And what does the world need most?

Self-love is the most selfless thing we can do for our close family and friends, for our relationships and for our environment. Many people I work with have anchored that self-love is selfish and makes you feel arrogant. I promise you, this is wrong. In the next two self-love parts I will teach you the most important tools and exercises to really dive into your self-love.